I consider myself a master of starting fresh, at the point zero. And I have developed a pretty good understanding of what is necessary to not to loose it when you have to build everything from ground up. Recently I had to move from one side of the ocean to the other, leave my friends and loved ones and pretty much decide who I will be from that point on. I got lucky – found a job in the first 2 weeks, moved to a new place in the third one and didn’t lose my mind in between.
Here are some points on how to have a fresh start, that I have developed during the years of living without a five year plan and constantly starting new.
Decide what you want for yourself – what is your main focus for the next 6-12 months. This might be the toughest decision, but when you finally can answer to the question “what do you want?” you will be able to make a plan how to get it which leads us to the second step.
Put down a list of possible elements that could help you to get there. Start by little things like if you want to get a job write a resume, take new profile picture or read every day at least one news story that is about your area. You never know when can it come handy.
Be creative! Are you looking for a new place to live? News flash – nobody will read your boring FB post, unless you make it eye catching. Use free online tools to make it fun. Recently I fell in love with very easy to use web page http://www.canva.com. Go try it! But be aware of it’s power to become addictive 🙂
Have a decent online presence! I personally filter every new contact and post I see through their past online behavior. If you have a cohesive image on all social network sites, you’re more likely to get a positive response to your “call to action” in the future. Show that you’re trustworthy and positive! But remember that some things are better left behind closed doors, since your future employer can also look at your profile!
Be humble and patient, because things take time. Don’t start to get depressed or negative after the first week of doing something new.
Don’t compare yourself to others. Social media is awesome. Love it, and yet I know that sometimes it triggers the wrong thoughts. Posts that we see online and the ones we see on any commercial media are distorted reality. Keep that in mind & remember that people get paid to work on them. Product placement, photoshop, marketing and branding. It’s supposed to make you want something, but you shouldn’t try to duplicate everything you see online and constantly compare your life with that. It’s a factory of dreams that die almost the second they are produced, because there’s always something “new”.
Don’t consult with people who don’t inspire you. If they start the sentence with a question “why” or “how” they will not really help you in this phase. More than that – all they can do is make you doubt yourself. Safe is not the word you’re looking for at the moment. Nothing about starting fresh is safe. It’s the scariest thing in the world. That’s why there are so many people who don’t feel good about their life and still keep on living it without changing anything. So you can decide what is harder – to suck it up and change something now, which will probably ask from you a lot of energy and effort for quite a long time, or to keep on going like this and then suck it up for the rest of your life. It’s like a splinter in your skin. It hurts to pull it out, but it’s definitely just getting worse if you let it stay in.
Improve and don’t be afraid to hear “no”. Look at it as your learning lesson. Every “no” will make the “yes” feel so much better and by continuing to improve yourself the stage “in between” will not feel like wasted time.
Make yourself a priority. Start thinking about yourself first and don’t do things because somebody really wants you to. Don’t go out partying if you have planned to work on your motivation letter the next day. I know that your friends will say “you can do it later”, but you’re the priority right now and there will be plenty parties afterwards.
Stay organized. Have a decent plan of the day, because it will make you less stressed. If you wake up at 9 not noon, and go to sleep at normal time, you will soon realize that you will feel better and more relaxed. Remember that you have to be awake and functioning during the day to get things done and make a good impression. Hangover and bad sleep are the number one things that can be read in your eyes. Take yourself seriously and support your decisions, it’s not that much to ask.
Don’t spend the money you don’t have. Look at your budget with eyes wide open.
Don’t look back 😉 You moved on for a reason.